What It Means To Be A Mom

My friend, tagged me to do this, I am a little late (sorry) but here it is anyway!

I have been thinking on how I would post this, and there is soo much I coulod say and go off on, and the subjects all seemed to eventually run into all the other aspects to being a mom, so I decided to post a sort of "journal entry" of how I have been feeling lately about things within myself that deal with my kids. Its not too specific, but within writing it I sort of reminded myself of what it is to be a mom and some sacrifices moms make to be a mom. So, here it is:

I am soo tired of my children not listening to me! They use to be so good (well-behaved, I mean they had their moments too). Now that they are older and can actually understand and remember the rules, it seems to have gotten worse!! Plus, it doesn't help that I feel like i'm the most HORRIBLE mom! With my oldest, I spent so much time with him. Just everyday stuff. Now, the everyday stuff, I try to get through as fast as I can so I can get other stuff done. Then I end up watching TV or trying to read. I feel like I don't get enough time to do what I want to do!

I knew with kids thet HAVE to come before most all else. I decided to forfeit my day when we had them, but I don't really know how to take back up the feeling I had when I first started my job as a mom (so many other things have happened along to help my feelings but still!!!). I am lost at how I can get back my attitude and feeling of accomplishment in just being a mom and staying at home everyday. I feel lazy when it comes time to take them to the park or go outside. When I do, they don't play or do anything unless I do it with them and the moment I stop, they stop. They don't stay interested. I want them to take what I start them off with and do their own thing with it. I want them to play own their own, with each other, without the fighting constantly and hurting each other!

But I am being HORRIBLE! I am wanting and waiting for someone to tell me that its ok for me to do what I want and all that I am feeling is fine. In reality its not! I am their rock, the one they depend on! I am their teacher, friend, chef, transportation, comfort, entertainer, and most important their MOTHER. It is not their job to make me feel better, loved, special, or important, It is MINE to make them feel thay way! And no one is here to pick up my slck and on top of it, It is no one's JOB to pick up my slack!!! My husband has unfortunaltly been the one I have tried to dump my load of responsibilities on and as wonderful as he is tried to do it, but it just made both of us miserable!


That is my "sort of" story on what it means to be a mom, though there are SOOOO much more to it!!!
I would tag someone, but I am new to this and don't really know anyone to tag (except for my friend who tagged me) so I will just encourage you to tell me what you think and/or share experiences with me or anyone you can count on!